Author: Andrew Moore
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I don’t know yet because I have a papaya…
This is an actual speech to text conversion presented to me with a straight face (I presume) by Google. “They’re an automatically. I moved out. But if you were expecting that talk to you Is it right I don’t know yet because I have a papaya. It’s a lot, bye hello, and I will get…
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Good morning, larvae!
Breakfast is more exciting now that the ladybug larvae have moved into their terrarium, a terrarium delivered rather early by Santa’s Fed Ex elves. Things we won’t mention until much later: Several of the larvae made it to Mom’s poppyseed muffins before we could retrieve them. We’re pretty sure we caught most of them, though.…
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Abby conjures a water spout
Bubble rings make perfect, inexpensive, pliable-plastic, unswallowable Christmas gifts, but how the hell do you get one into a stocking?
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On the first day of functional Christmas…
Every once in a while you see a product and say to yourself, “damn… I’m an idiot. Why didn’t I think of, develop, market, and sell this? I could have been rich. I could be playing golf in a warm climate right now. I could be bitching about Obama visiting and screwing up the traffic…
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Another toy arrives!
One of the best things about the soon-to-be bankrupt U.S. mail is that its uneven service works wonders for spreading out your birthday gifts. If your birthday is… say… on the 15th, and you have friends and relatives that live more than a state away, you can bank on getting presents in the mail until…
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Verizon Phones as of right now
There are four contenders for your smartphone money right now if you’re on Verizon: Galaxy Nexus Motorola Droid Razr update… Droid Razr Maxx now available with a much larger, but still non-removable battery. HTC Rezound Apple iPhone 4S Really short version: I’d reluctantly get the Galaxy Nexus over the Razr, but I can’t help wondering…
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Birthday train table assembly recap
Time to assemble: 5 hours, 23 minutes. Missing parts: honest instructions, 3 screws, 7 AAA batteries, 4 gin martinis, and 1 properly-sized allen wrench. Number of Chinese factory workers laughing their asses off at me: at least 1. Time until first child fist fight over a train: 18 minutes. Time until second child fist fight…
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T.W.A. – Straight Outta Peabody
Straight outta Peabody… I’m a crazy monkeybaby name-a FreezPop From the gang called Toddlerz With Asugarhigh. If I’m yelled at, I musta stole a cookie cat. Dropped the box and made a mess; now where the dog at? Chorus
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Home Additions!
In order to get Hogan and me farther away from them, my parents are busy digging in, hammering on, and swearing about the soon-to-be finished basement. Actually, my father has few practical skills, so this project, in truth, is a “pay someone else and then pretend you are a foreman” project. To show my disgust…
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2011 Trails to Ale Results
Some race notes: Christian and Andy drank frosty drafts at the Great Lost Bear the night before the race, so technically they ran the “Ales to Trails to Ale” race. Andy was the only one of the three runners to spend time in first place, second place, and last place. Unfortunately, the only time he…
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Parenting by police cars and fire trucks
Ultimately, you never know how your kid is going to turn out in the end, but it’s probably important to watch for signs of trouble and to at least try to put the young back on a better path when necessary. Sometimes it’s easy and nature lobs you soft, underhanded meatball situations to get you…
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Collectible Race Cards available soon!
We are only about a week away from the long-awaited 10 Kilometer throwdown pitting Andy against both Christian “the turtle” Teter and Matt “helix pomatia” Hatem. This will be Andy’s first competitive race since he humiliated Hatem at the second Bridges for Friendship race sometime last millennium. In commemoration of the event, limited-edition, collectible race…
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Toddler finds Cat in the Hat cartoon annoying – watches anyway
Peabody toddler Abigail Moore admitted that she “actually hates” WGBH’s Cat in the Hat cartoon, but she continues to watch it on occasion because it’s more fun than “doing whatever her parents want her to do instead.” I legitimately like Curious George, but I put up with Martin Short’s incredibly grating voice and poorly-conceived hijinks…
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Jani Lane’s Death Thwarts Peabody Man’s Hair Band Trifecta!
Dan Loring’s dream of seeing long-in-the-tooth reunion concerts by Def Leppard, Cinderella, and Warrant all in one glorious summer imploded early Friday as Warrant lead singer, Jani Lane, inconveniently gave up the ghost in a Woodland Hills Comfort Inn. Reached for comment, Mr. Loring lamented Lane’s passing. “‘Cherry Pie’ was a formative… I mean… a watershed…
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The Papa Whisperer
Sometimes it’s difficult to be a toddler. You have short legs, you have limited funds, and you have trouble making your way through crowds on your own. “Perhaps my lazy father is right,” thought Abby. I had considered this very Papa project last summer. Jim was difficult to control at first. Abby had quite a…
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Peabody mother solves swing-shortage problem!
Peabody, MA – Trudi’s quick thinking halted a potentially violent toddler showdown at a local playground on Wednesday. Asked about her heroic actions, Trudi replied, “it came down to simple mathematics. There were three kids and two swings, so a little sharing saved the day.” Trudi’s actions were not entirely without controversy, however. Emily Moore,…