Author: Andrew Moore
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Abby sends video to Belichick
Tired of Patriot running backs going down before the end of the season, Abby trains for the position:
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WWfB Flirts with Perfection!
Will Work for Beer put on a dominating display last night at The Tin Whistle, coming within 2 correct questions of a perfect score! Only the wily, pro-slavery Martin Van Buren and the occasionally anti-Semitic while drunk driving Mel Gibson were able to trip up the understaffed but overachieving tri-force of trivia power. Apparently little…
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Baby Explains Recent Misbehavior
Asked recently about her apparent unwillingness to cooperate or to act according to her parents’ wishes, Abigail Moore explained, “I don’t really listen to them. I pretty much do whatever I want.” Pressed for additional details, Abigail continued, “look… they have their agenda and I have my agenda. Sometimes our goals synch up, but often…
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Avian Violence at Chez Moore!
We seem to have a problem attracting the right winged visitors. I put up a bat house two years ago; hornets moved into it. I replaced the bat house with a bird feeder last year; birds are now killing (and eating!) each other (in addition to the seeds!) in our back yard! At first we…
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Survivor is Dead to Me…
“If she can win the game twice, there is a flaw in the game.” Russell Hantz. Yep… there’s a definite flaw in the game. Twice in a row now (and I’ve only watched the last two seasons!), the most pathetic player remaining has been voted the winner of Survivor by a crew of sour grapes losers.…
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Open the damn Howling Wolf Already!
Look at this! I’m eating an unpeeled carrot and bread I was supposed to throw to the ducks in the pond. I COULD be eating a delicious burrito from the Howling Wolf Taqueria if Pat would get off his ass and open the doors while I’m still young enough to be carried into the restaurant!
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Baby Jawa!
Is it the Iron Sheikette? No! It’s a baby Jawa… and as Addison noted… it’s a baby Jawa dancing on the new bamboo!
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Defenestrators Dominate!
Buoyed by a final round requiring identification of sundry 80’s Hair Bands, the Defenestrators dropped in unexpectedly and took home first place cash from Tin Whistle Trivia. What we knew: just about everything, frankly. Who told you not to squeeze the Charmin? We know. Who discovered penicillin? We know. What NFL team won Superbowl I?…
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Joanie Phone Home!
Pretty much everyone except Matt H now realizes that the Android operating system is the best platform for a mobile phone, but getting the right phone is just the beginning. Joanie, like much of the Generation V demographic, still needs a little help parenting her new Droid. In the hopes that it will be of…
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Better Call Saul, Baby!
Although I usually speak an alien baby language, Mom’s always worried I’m going to start spewing four-letter words like my Dad. Sure… he can be pretty funny when he hits his thumb with a hammer or runs into the coffee table with his knee, but the word that really strikes my baby fancy these days…
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A Word from the Owner
Today I’d like to take a moment to talk to you about presents… and more specifically… my presents. I like presents. Presents help to keep me happy. As my parents will tell you, things tend to go more smoothly when I am happy and less smoothly when I am not happy, so it’s in EVERYONE’S…
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Max Computer Repair
So Max arrives at our house on Saturday and promptly says, “Uncle Andy, thanks for helping my Dad out with his computer problems, but you’re going about it the wrong way. You have to show that virus who’s boss! You gotta take control pack leader style! You gotta spit in the malware’s eye and stomp…
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Just a little Quiet before the Madness…
Some have suggested that I have left the Cancun post up for an inordinate amount of time simply because it represents such a convincing victory over Nancy and Christian. Never before have I competed in the pseudo marine biochemistry field, so it IS amazing for me to walk away with the gold medal in salinity…
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Like Salt in the Cancun!
If you do not recall or were not privy to the quasi cerebral discussion in waist-deep Cancun water concerning waist-deep Cancun water, the following hypotheses emerged concerning presumed higher salinity levels as one approaches the equator: Christian surmised, “warmer water allows for a higher concentration of salt due to solubility properties. Warmer water can simply…
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Better Walking Evidence
Since Jim expressed doubt over the earlier Zapruder films, here is a marginally better one. One of these days we’ll film during the day and not in front of a lamp.
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Some Abby Walking!
These are a little dark, but they’re undeniable evidence that Abby is now a walker! Don’t down your bottle and then try to walk!
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Lost Cancun Photos
As many of you know, some official Cancun pictures have made their way online, but a few pictures have been held back and I’ll be publishing them with commentary over the next few weeks. Lost Cancun Photo #1: The Max & Billy Dust Up It’s common knowledge that the flight from Boston to Cancun was…
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Jets ain’t no Mets… give em that!
After the possibility of New Orleans playing in… errr… winning a Super Bowl, the Jets playoff run is arguably the best team story in the NFL this year. Instead of manufacturing a great regular season lead and then squandering it on the way towards (but not to!) the playoffs, the Jets put their act together…
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Abigail Mailbag: Holiday Shopping Edition!
Many of you have written me for holiday advice, so let’s take care of the most difficult part of the holidays first… the shopping! Ebenezer writes, “Abigail, I never know what to buy and the mall crowds frighten me. Can’t we just call the whole thing off?” Deep breaths, Ebenezer. All you’re missing is a…
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Winter currently sucks!
White stuff is cold. Can’t move in this damn suit. Can’t see in this damn hat. Parents are laughing at me. This is why I bite.
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Kenny Marches… ummm… in.
Unfortunately for me, the New Orleans Saints have postponed their late season swoon this year. As they’re practically assured of a first-round bye at this point, we’ll have to wait until the second round of the NFL playoffs to watch them crush the tiny hopes and dreams of a below-sea-level, eyesore city not yet recovered…
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Halloween Baby Kumite!
High in the carpet-covered hills of Peabody, two furry, fictional characters locked in mortal (if infantile!) combat. Bulbous yet agile, Maximus “Master Arachnawalrus” seized with two of his eight legs a plastic platform of immense size and hurled it at the relentless tigress! Sabertoothed Abbysaurus dodged with cat-like reflexes and struck with a fury that…
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Abby Beta Tests Halloween Outfit!
In a move surely designed to antagonize Hogan, Abby “chose” to be a tiger for Halloween. More troubling, Abby then “decided” to try on her furry outfit and to parade in front of the Rhodesian Ridgeback as he dozed on his leather lounger. Hogan did not, however, leap off the couch and try to corner…