Northshore Man hints Emergency Appendectomy was “Elective Surgery”

Addison rocks the muumuu!

Insisting that whatever Joanie can do he can do better, Salem-based television mounter, Addison Chrystie, recently dialed 911 for the “free ride to the hospital and straight shot to the front of the ER line.”

Addison explained, “I heard that Joanie had her tonsils removed recently, so I thought I’d one-up her by taking out my appendix.”

Told that Joanie, in truth, had beaten him to the appendectomy by several months, Addison paused, visibly upset, and replied, “yeah… really? You sure? Yeah… well !&#@ it… we’ll see about that! I haven’t been released yet, so I may very well have a kidney out while I’m in here!”

Asked about the dueling “ectomists,” Doctor Daneeka replied, “we’re seeing more and more of it these days. It’s probably a side effect of our new socialist health care system.”

1 thought on “Northshore Man hints Emergency Appendectomy was “Elective Surgery””

  1. All these years of paying into the healthcare system, realized that I’ve been doing it wrong. The important thing to do, according to your president and democratic congress, is to spend FAR more than you pay in. Granted, I’m quite far behind, but it’s a marathon, not a sprint, and I feel good about my chances. Tell that silly Joanie, that in a fever fueled creative thinking spree, I’ve decided to get emergency liposuction, fuse two of my vertebrae, and get breast implants.
    I plan to leave the hospital a new man, and well on my way to turning that spend to pay ratio upside down.

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